Monthly Archives: August 2011

Ok, so are you PUMPED for this post??? Yeah!

9 to 5 can be tough. You can’t sleep until 11am. Museums are crowded whenever you’re free to visit. Sometimes people drink the organic milk you left in the fridge as a special treat for yourself because the milk delivery was delayed until Monday afternoon.

Essential to survival in these harsh conditions? Drinking lunches:

Tying up your boss and taking over management of the company:

(This option should only be employed in extreme circumstances, i.e., sexual harassment, theft of intellectual property, etc. As the old saying goes, don’t commit felony kidnapping over “missing” organic milk. For further clarity, see full feature film.)

Aaaaand, of course, looking cute:

For seriously though, it ain’t a terrible life after all (but I want my milk replaced). I recently read a story called The Goblin and the Grocer, which was billed as a “fairy tale for adults” in The Annotated Hans Christian Anderson (yeah, that’s right), about a kept goblin. The goblin lives with a grocer  and his wife because they supply him with porridge, but in the story, he falls in love with the warm light of poetry. He considers moving in with a penniless student, who, though short on porridge, is rich with poetry. Then the building catches on fire for some reason (the destructive consequences of his unbridled passion?) and the story loses focus a bit, but it ends with this great line:

“‘I’ll simply have to divide myself between them,’ he declared. ‘That way, each one will have a little something. How can I give up the grocer? He’s the one with the porridge.’ And that was spoken in truly human terms! If we’re really honest about it, then we have to admit that the world is like that. The rest of us would end up at the grocer’s too. We need the porridge.”

Exactly. I don’t know about you, but my poetry sure comes with a price tag. So I’m off to make some porridge.

Oh hey, happy Friday y’all. In the same vein as last post, and while I’m still conducting research for next post (i.e. watching Dolly Parton movies), this really nice guy said something awesome to me this morning:

“Your casual Friday outfits aren’t really casual, they’re more like ‘I am Kim, all shall love me and despair!!'”

Although I’ve always considered myself more of an Arwen (and a COMPLETE nerd, apparently), this was a nice way to summarize that uptight attitude toward dressing to which I was previously alluding:

(Side note: how do you like that totally ghetto video?) But seriously girl, get a grip. There are plenty of ways to accessorize besides that “one ring”. Oh hello pun town!

For more on the Dark Lord, please see: http://www.sybarites.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/karl-lagerfeld-x-steiff-01.jpg

Truth be told, moving to Brooklyn has prompted a sartorial crisis in my life that’s sort of been getting me down. I am seriously too uptight to deal with the overall casualness that is the Williamsburg/Bushwick wardrobe, where as far as the eye can see deconstructed tops and cut-offs are uniformly paired with the perfect combat boot.

Really. Combat boots! In summer! And yet, not only does it look cool, no one is dying of heatstroke. Like I said, too uptight. Compound this with the common workplace dilemma of trying to dress well without looking either dowdy (like Michelle Pfeiffer in Batman Returns, before she becomes  Catwoman)

or slutty (like Michelle Pfeiffer in Batman Returns, after she becomes Catwoman)

and it becomes clear why I’ve fallen behind in documenting my beloved practice of looking awesome (aka anxiety is a dish best served alone, with only a cold bottle of flat inertia to wash it down).

So I took this weekend to cool my jets a bit by practicing my own version of super casual, better known (in my head) as sup-cas.

Friday, to work:

and possibly the worst picture ever taken of me.

Saturday, to the four hour wait at the Savage Beauty Exhibit:

oh wait, that’s not me…

Fuck, that’s not it either! Though I do sometimes like to wear this on a casual night out with the girls

But really,

yeah, that’s more like it.

Sunday [and the premiere of my gentleman photographer, who will surely up the production value of We Look Awesome with his mad skillz (aka new iPhone/Fine Arts degree)]:

Not so bad, eh? But alas, back to the grind tomorrow…are you sure that catsuit isn’t work appropriate?